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  • 01.05.2018
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Mother says no

The discussion has been stoked by the first scholarship on regret; Israeli sociologist Orna Donath thrust it into the spotlight with her book Regretting Motherhood: A Study , based on interviews with 23 Israeli women, all anonymous, aged 26 to 73, five of them grandmothers. Frank Bauer. In pushing the boundaries of accepted maternal response, however, something else is happening: a small group of women are reframing motherhood, an institution increasingly idealized and commodified to near-absurd ends. June Cleaver has been replaced by Jessica Alba, the former actress who runs a billion-dollar organic baby goods empire and posts Instagram images of perfect airbrushed domesticity for her millions of followers. Pressure on women to have kids is intense, says Amy. Anti-natalist philosopher David Benatar, the subject of a recent New Yorker profile , even argues no one should have children on compassionate grounds given the painfulness of life. Add to that the notion that children bring self-fulfillment or self-actualization, and it becomes a breeding ground for regret.
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'Self-care' is not enough to fix how much moms are burnt out

Mother says no
Mother says no
Mother says no
Mother says no
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Mother Doesn't Want a Dog

I sat in bed, haphazardly staring at my phone, my thumb robotically scrolling through Instagram posts of moms clearly doing it better than I was. My back ached from my hunched posture, but adjusting my body felt like too much work. From down the hall, a little voice called out, "Mom, I can't sleep," and all I could muster were the words, "Okay, babe. Because I had run out of solutions, run out of words. I considered the question.
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Mother doesn't want a dog. Mother says they smell, And never sit when you say sit, Or even when you yell. And when you come home late at night And there is ice and snow, You have to go back out because The dumb dog has to go.
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